Bulletstorm OMG

Bulletstorm OMG

I can't put into words the level of excitement I have for this game being re-released now for X-Box One.  If you haven't played it, you need to.  If you want to see a game that came before it's time, you need to play this game.  If ever there was a game I'm more of a fanboy of then TF1/TF2, it's this fucking game.  If you want to know why I dropped the F-bomb you need to play this game.  Called the most fowl, violent, and sexual game of its time, so much so that they were sewed for its level of inappropriate material, this game is like Duke Nukem on steroids.  Ironically, so much so, the re-release will feature the Duke himself.

The Bad:

1) It's not for everyone, especially kids. Lots of cussing, lots of sex related jokes, extremely violent, and sexually charged insults.  So violent that a piece of gear you get encourages you to be as creative as possible when killing people.  Set them on fire? Bonus points!  Shoot them in the ass while airborne? Bonus points!  Oh and there's beer on the table.  Reach 20 bottles and get a bonus.

2) It's currently only on X-Box 360 and earlier consoles, and the controls are wonky.  I'll try to explain it the best I can, but it feels like when you aim you are aiming on a grid system that is up then over, instead of arching in a smooth fashion.  It makes precision killing a problem and a slight irritation.  It is overcome by using the kick skill more.

3) There is no jumping.  Seems rather lame but in order to get over a tree trunk on the ground you have to walk over to it and hit A.  Can't jump up and shoot over something either.  No third person take downs or cut scense just elemental and weapon fatalities.  Also no grenades... which is probably the most disappointing, but it encourages you to shoot all the elemental explosive items. Again its a small irritation.

4) Story line is a bit shallow and predictable.  Been betrayed, when attacking said traitor you and them crash land on a hostile planet, whole game consists of you trying to get off planet and kill the traitor.  Also you are very limited on weapons.  Though you can level them up.

5) Can't play it while other, more sensitive, people are around.  The cursing and sexually explicit language is immediately offensive to parents, and people of stronger moral fiber.

The Good: (Oh so much good!)

1) This game was before it's time.  It incorporates sliding, kicking, leash throwing, creative death dealing, boss killing, weapon upgrading, amaze-balls.  Of these the leash, which is like an electronic lasso that flies out and grabs people, like Scorpion in mortal combat, flings them back at you for a kick, shoot, or map based fatality is by far my favorite aspect.  You can upgrade the leash to provide a "thumper" which when released causes enemies and map elements to fly into the air in slow motion, and you then get the chance to kill them in creative ways.

2) The naughtiness.  Mmm nothing like a well used potty mouth.  Seriously the cursing and dirty jokes and language in this game add so much humor and thrill to this game that its hard to put down simply because you want to hear what they'll say next.  

3) You get to control a giant robot dinosaur that shoots lasers out of it's eyes.  Enough said Mr. Waggleton P. Tallylicker.  

4) For a 360 game it is still very beautifully crafted and created.  I always have to have some throw back either good or bad to the artistry of these games.  The planet you are on is somewhat tropical in nature, so the trees, water, landscape, and city is beautifully designed and colored as an abandoned high cost resort.  Warm colors through out, with a lot of attention to detail in terms of environment.

5)  This is what I would expect from a futuristic shooter.  Almost more so then TF1, TF2, Halo, and COD.  Weapons that do more than one thing.  Technological advancements that make warfare more interesting by creating better weapons, better soldiers, and failed experiments that create terrible monsters.  For example sniper bullets that you can steer and after an upgrade explode if you miss your target, the leash which helps track your performance and tracks your points and recommends ways to gain more points, while at the same time can be used to kill, pull, and move objects.  There are also various creatures/villains that make the game exciting and fresh, from killer plants and animals to gangs, cannibals, monsters, and soldiers.

There are definitely things that need fixed in this game, however most of them are small.  Again as a futuristic shooter goes this game blows the doors off most conventional games and puts them to shame, while hurting their feelings by calling them pussies.  I probably won't pay full price for the game upon it's release but if it ever gets down to the $20 - $30 mark I might splurge and buy it a second time, just to see the improved graphics and to play as the Duke.